Pink Bow Tie
where is my daughter Kim Kardashian


me and my friend arriving at an all you can eat buffet 


pumpkin spice candles soon

pumpkin lattes soon

pumpkin everything



matching icons for you and your friends

To my future wife…



When I die I want you to mix my ashes in a bowl of chili, then eat it. Just so I can tear that ass up one more time.

this si so wild and out of this world my dude


i scare people lots because i walk very softly and they don’t hear me enter rooms so when they turn around i’m just kind of there and their fear fuels me

i ran into my mother while getting water downstairs in the kitchen, and she asked me whats up and i said”oh, nothing, about to go draw some aliens and porn.” and she didn’t say nothing for a few moments as if she was thinking, then looked up with an appalled expression and said “aliens?!” im laughing so hardom g 



Why does no one tell me if we have people over, I just walked downstairs wearing a ‘say hey if youre gay’ T-shirt and batman boxers. We had 8 people over.

They saw

did any of them say hey

+ 60,718 plays


this fucking never fails to make me laugh